Now And Forever
Chapter 02

By Abraxan

There it is! He pushed his Firebolt Excalibur into a steep dive, following the swift golden ball toward the ground. He squinted as the wind tore at his robes, glad his glasses protected his eyes from at least some of the wind’s pressure. He was flying so fast, he could hear the sound of his collar-length hair snapping in the wind.

Harry felt his brain go muzzy for an instant. It felt as if he were watching the front end of the Excalibur from a great distance. He shook his head, trying to force his brain to get back on track. When it finally snapped into focus again, he saw that he was much too close to the ground. He was going to crash! He hauled on the front of the broom as hard as he could, but then he heard a great crack as the broom handle hit the ground at tremendous speed. Harry felt his body flying through the air in what seemed like slow-motion. He could hear shouts from his team mates, but their voices were faint and he couldn’t make sense of what they were saying. With a tremendous wham, his body hit the ground and everything went blessedly dark.

* * * * *

Harry gradually became aware of a feeling of restraint. Something was holding his arms and shoulders still. His legs too. What was wrong with him? He had to work hard to open his eyes. Nothing wanted to move very well, and he hurt all over.

"He’s awake!" Ron’s familiar voice was a welcome sound, but he seemed to be shouting. Why?

"Ron?" Harry managed as he finally got his eyes to open. He squinted for a moment and closed them again. It hurt too much to see the light. He felt someone place his glasses on his face and opened his eyes again. The light was still painful, but at least he could see Ron’s worried face above him now. "Thanks."

"No problem. How are you?" Ron said as he lowered himself into a chair by the bed. Hermione sat next to him, her face streaked with tears. She sniffled and wiped her eyes with her handkerchief and gave Harry a watery smile.

Harry tried to return her smile, but his face wouldn’t cooperate yet. He looked back at Ron. "What happened?"

"You ploughed yourself, mate," Ron said, sounding both impressed and offended. "It was a spectacular crash."

Harry grimaced, which made him wince in pain. "Huh?"

"You never plough yourself," Ron went on, his ginger brows drawn together in a frown. "Did something go wrong with your broom?"

"Dunno."

"What’s wrong, Potter?" Bob Smithers, the team captain said. "You’ve been off form for weeks. Not that your performance in games has suffered, but you’re not as sharp as you were a few months ago. What’s going on?"

"I’m . . . fine. I just . . . misjudged the dive."

"You’ve never misjudged a dive in your life, Harry." Ron’s face was serious.

"I just didn’t . . . sleep well, that’s all." Harry sighed. "I was tired." He didn’t like waking up after being injured without Ginny nearby. He closed his eyes and sighed again. "Where . . .?"

"St. Mungo’s," Ron replied. "Marcus is looking after you. He says you’ll live, which surprised him after he heard what happened."

Harry opened his eyes again and stared at his best friend. "How bad?"

"Cracked skull, two broken arms, a broken collarbone, bruised organs. Nothing Marcus can’t cure," Ron said. "Your broken bones are already healed. They have your arms strapped to your body so the tendons and stuff can heal properly. Apparently you tore a load of them too."

"Oh, Harry, you could’ve died!" Hermione sobbed when Ron finished.

Harry glanced at her and tried to smile again as he muttered, "But I didn’t," then looked back at Ron. "Legs?"

"Broken but healed. Torn ligaments in your knees or something like that. You’ll be fine. You just need to rest a while."

"How long?"

"Couple of days."

Harry nodded. Thank Merlin for magic and magical medicine! With such injuries in the Muggle world, he’d be in the hospital for ages.

"Potter," Smithers said now, "if you’re ill, or too tired to fly safely, you may have to rethink this schedule you’ve set yourself. What do you want to continue doing, and what are you willing to give up? Think about it seriously, lad. We want you to be our Seeker, but we don’t want you to kill yourself to keep the job."

Before Harry could answer, Ginny ran into the room, followed closely by Albus Dumbledore and Remus Lupin.

"Oh, Harry! You look awful!" Ginny said as she bent over the bed and gave him a gentle kiss.

"You look beautiful," he murmured, lifting his lips for another kiss. "I’m sorry about this."

"So am I."

"Harry, Mr. Smithers is right." Dumbledore had a worried frown on his face. "You’re over-extended. I’m sorry, lad, I didn’t mean to―"

"No!" Harry cried, struggling to sit up. He moaned and fell back on the bed, then lay there panting with pain.

"You have to rest, Harry," Ginny told him. "Just relax."

"No!" Harry fought the slings and bandages that restrained him, then gasped and lay still, panting with pain. "It . . . it isn’t . . . the schedule."

"Then what is it?" Remus asked in a gentle voice.

Harry’s eyes locked on his godfather’s, desperate for Remus to understand. "I have nightmares―" He shuddered as his voice trailed off.

Dumbledore frowned and leaned toward him. "Nightmares? What are they about?"

"The war. I keep seeing my friends being . . . blown up." Harry looked at his grandfather, and saw a sad comprehension in his eyes. "Some things really happened," he glanced at Ginny, then back at his grandfather, who was nodding, "and others didn’t. It’s driving me mad. Merlin wakes me when they get too bad."

Hermione was distraught. "Why didn’t you call for us? We’re just across the hall!"

"You’re married now. I didn’t want to bother you."

"You prat!" Ron exploded. "You’re trying to be a hero again, and nearly killed yourself because of it!"

"I’m not―"

"Yes, you are," Ron insisted. "Hermione and I are helping each other through bad dreams. We would’ve helped you. When did they start?"

Harry didn’t want Ron and Hermione to worry about him, but what was he going to do? He decided to answer honestly. "When Ginny went back to school."

Remus sat on the side of the bed very carefully. "What can we do to help you, Harry?"

Harry gave his godfather a serious look. "Make the dreams go away."

Before Remus could reply, a nurse came in the room and stood glowering at them with her hands on her hips. "There are too many people in here! This young man needs his rest!"

"We know," Ron snapped. "That’s what we’re working on!"

"Harry, let me know what you decide," Smithers said. "Your place will be held for you while you heal, but you need to get your strength and energy back before you ride an Excalibur again."

"Thanks for being patient with me. I want to stay on the team, Bob. Please don’t give up on me."

"I’ll talk to you later, lad. Get some rest." With that, Smithers left the room.

Harry looked around at the others in the room: Ginny, Ron, Hermione, Remus and his grandfather, all people who loved him, their faces showing how it hurt them to see him badly injured again. He didn’t know what to do, how to fix his problem. He’d been just barely getting by for the last week or so. This crash was the inevitable result of his exhaustion.

"You’re much too thin," his grandfather said. "Have you been eating?"

Harry knew then that his Glamour Charm had been broken. He tried to put on a brave front. "Yeah, of course!"

"Do your dreams make you ill?" Dumbledore said, leaning closer to his grandson.

With those blue eyes boring into his, Harry knew he couldn’t lie. "Yes."

"How much weight have you lost?"

"I haven’t weighed myself for a while."

"You didn’t have any weight to spare, Harry. You simply must eat and keep the food down. I’ll have a word with Marcus about this."

Harry slumped in the bed. All of his secrets were out now. He’d be kicked off the team, out of Auror School and probably lose his position at Hogwarts, as well. Then there’d be nothing to distract him from the horrific images in his mind.

"My dear boy," his grandfather said, rubbing a gentle hand over Harry’s head in an affectionate gesture, "we’ll get your problems sorted out. Don’t worry. Just do your best to eat and follow the healer’s directions, and you’ll be fine before you know it."

Harry nodded, then glanced back at Remus, who’d just cleared his throat.

"Have you tried Dreamless Sleep Potion, Harry?" Remus said now.

"No."

"We aren’t allowed to use potions unless we’re injured. Quidditch League rules," Ron added.

"Well, while you’re here, perhaps you could try it," Remus said. "And maybe Marcus can come up with something that’s allowed by the League to help you. You haven’t asked anyone for help with this, have you?"

"No. I thought I was just missing Ginny," he said, glancing up at her when she sighed.

"I miss you too," she said.

The nurse cleared her throat. "I must insist on more of you leaving. Mr. Potter needs to rest."

Remus got to his feet. "Tonks wanted to come, too, but she’s so pregnant, she isn’t travelling much anymore. She sends her love."

"How is she?" Ginny said.

"She’s glowing," Remus said with pride. "She’s never been more beautiful."

"Tell her I’ll come and see her as soon as I can," Harry told his godfather. "I’m sorry I worried her."

"You get well, lad," Remus said. "Why don’t you consider coming to stay with us on one of your free weekends? You could visit Ginny, or Ginny could come and stay with us too. It might be a nice break for you, and Tonks would love to have a chance to spoil you."

"Thanks. I’ll do that."