By Abraxan
Reviews
Quizer posted a comment on Wednesday 15th February 2006 4:56am
Sigh... apparently nothing I said in my reviews had any sort of effect... Considering that you said you had this stuff written already, it makes sense, though.
Still, I don't get why Harry had to have yet another ordeal that knocked him back to the brink of death. Is it too hard to have even a couple of days in which Harry is at full health, full power, and simply enjoying himself? You've long since surpassed the stages in which it was suspenseful, then repetitive, then overused, then ridiculous, then annoying, then disappointing. I think 'exasperating' comes close now, but that word doesn't really have the strength of expression I'm looking for.
I was also annoyed that Harry seemed to show such a lack of common sense in healing Snape, until it got clear that it was more complicated than that and his magic was acting on his own. Harry does have better judgment than that, and even his 'saving-people thing' wouldn't be able to override that. Good job for not falling for that.
The part with Rita Skeeter was good and I liked that one, because she got what she deserved and all it did to Harry was cause him a bit of immediate pain. He should have ratted her out for being an illegal animagus, though. If he gets this sort of treatment, he might just as well crush her completely.
All in all, it was not a very enjoyable read, and that's sad, because it does have the potential. But as long as Harry gets kicked in the balls at every available turn, it's not going to happen.
I hope the remaining three updates are a bit more light-hearted.
Quizer
Abraxan replied:
Guess what? I don't write to please you. I write to please ME! And I don't change what I've written or plan to write in response to reviews, either. If I let reviewers influence my writing, it would no longer be MY writing and would be a mishmashed mess of crap, not a decent story. If it wasn't at least halfway decent, you wouldn't have kept reading, would you? If you don't like it, stop reading it. But then you'll miss the happy ending you've been looking for for too many chapters, you impatient person you!! ;->
Yes, Harry's magic and the snake took over in that case. Good of you to notice that.
Rita's Animagus form was discovered back in Refiners, I think it was, back when she was forced to do Community Service (Molly told us about it -- maybe it was early in Destiny, I don't remember). She can't transform anymore.
Don't expect all three chapters to be entirely light-hearted, or there would be no need for three chapters. If you don't want to read what *I* wanted to read (which is why I wrote this), then stop reading it. I hope you enjoy the rest of it, if you decide to continue reading.
Abraxan
Michael69 posted a comment on Wednesday 15th February 2006 3:55am
Will this guy EVER get out of a hospital bed? How many times should Harry have died now? It's gotta be in the teens now. Once again, great chapter..I'm still a fan, forever devoted and all, but if I were Ginny, I think I'd have put a pillow over Harry's face by now, just to avoid the repeating emotional roller coaster.
Abraxan replied:
Sure he'll be out of the hospital bed! For heaven's sake, he had a good bit of time out of the hospital between the beginning and end of the chapter (long enough to study for NEWTs and take his exam). Too bad you don't enjoy roller coasters -- lots of other people do.
Abraxan
Robin Westerly posted a comment on Wednesday 15th February 2006 3:02am
yayayayayayayayayayayay!!!!
I am making odd gurgling giggly sounds of happiness at the moment.
Thank you
Abraxan replied:
LOL! Thanks for a very cute review! I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter!
Abraxan
kittykatluver posted a comment on Wednesday 15th February 2006 2:45am
Hey, I liked the Tofty POV part! Good job!
Abraxan replied:
Thanks! I think he's a cute character and thought it would be fun to see what he thought of what was going on. Glad you liked it!
Abraxan
Asad posted a comment on Wednesday 15th February 2006 1:32am
Snape thanking Harry? Will wonders ever cease to exist?
Abraxan replied:
Yup, Snape thanked Harry! Miracles still happen! LOL! thanks for writing!
Abraxan
Imp posted a comment on Tuesday 14th February 2006 6:05am
Wow. Harry is the most powerful wizard in the world!!! Snape isn't really the mean old bag of grease we thought he was. I liked the story he told Harry about how he had tried to protect Lily. YOU PUT HIM IN THE HOSPITAL WING AGAIN!?!?!? HE JUST GOT OUT!!!! Naxarba is truly cruel to Harry and detriment to his well being in general. She needs to be kept as far away from Harry as possible. Snape getting to repay Harry by having that potion ready was a nice part too. I don't think he could stand being in Harry's debt for too long, even with most of the dark mark gone.XD I'm glad Zabini went the way he did. Maybe that will teach people to stop attacking him.
Abraxan replied:
The way Zabini went was planned (by me) to show other people they shouldn't mess with Harry -- well-spotted! Harry's a warrior -- spending time in the hospital just goes with the territory until the wizarding world is truly at peace. Then he'll be in the hospital from time to time as a result of Quidditch injuries, most likely, LOL! He's just that kind of guy, bless him!
Abraxan
Hannah2 posted a comment on Sunday 12th February 2006 1:11pm
Oh and also: I got my Lions shirt!! It is wonderful. I will wear it to school on Monday and promenade.
Abraxan replied:
Cool! I'm so glad you like it! Thanks for ordering! I hope your friends like it too.
Abraxan
Hannah2 posted a comment on Sunday 12th February 2006 1:05pm
Oh my gosh, I am so happy that I've finally gotten to read this chapter! You see, my computer was broken for days and days and I had to get a new one and - gar! It took way to long! First thing I did was read Refiners. ^_^
Stunning! I freaked out when I thought Harry was about to die (of course, I know you wouldn't let him die after all of this, but it was terrifying all the same) and my dad ran into my room asking if I'd broken the computer already. Haha. Very funny, dad.
Everything just as brilliant as it always is. HEART HEART HEART.
Just one thing. I noticed a stray quotation mark in this line: "I went with Remus so I could learn how to help him with his therapy," Tonks said with a guilty look. "I should have stayed with you, Harry. "I’m sorry."
It's right before 'I'm sorry'.
Didn't see anythine else, but then again I can never really pay that much attention to anything other than the story while I'm reading it. Besides, who gives a rats arse about quotation marks when there's a new chapter of Refiners? Not I, I assure you.
Poor Harry, he needs a good long vacation with no trips to the hospital, don't you think? Unfortunatly, Harry and vacation are not workds that go together very often.
You are brilliant.
<3
Abraxan replied:
Glad you liked the chapter! And happy new computer!! Isn't it a pain to change puters, get everything set up the way you want it, and have to learn a new system, usually just when you'd gotten used to the old one? Ack! Hope it works well for you!
Thanks for writing!
Abraxan
Quizer posted a comment on Thursday 9th February 2006 9:23pm
> You're talking about a Sock-'Em Clown (that's one name for them) which
> you hit and it stands right back up again. Nope, I'm NOT portraying him
> that way, quite honestly. There are subtleties going on here that take a
> bit of life experience to understand.
I'm sure you didn't mean for it to come across this way and maybe there are really subtleties involved I'm too young to understand yet. I'll check back here in a decade or two and maybe I'll get it next time. ;)
and write those chapters soon! ;)
Quizer
Abraxan replied:
LOL! Yeah, maybe in a decade or two you WILL understand! I don't mean to sound rude toward young people -- I'm glad you guys enjoy my fics! But I've actually been quite surprised to see that some of the things I've written based on life experience are rejected as "impossible" by younger readers - yet older readers nod and say "Yup, that's exactly right." That's all I'm basing that statement on, and I was as surprised as anyone else to see that. I'm a lot like Neville in some ways (Neville in the GoF film) -- I would stand in the lake and go "AMAZING!" if I found something interesting, and that's what I've done here. I find this observation about the difference in interpretation of my story based on the age of the reader to be "amazing" and quite interesting. And the only thing I can attribute the difference to is life experience -- IOW, age.
The chapters are all written -- some of them are still being beta'd. They'll be posted one at a time, so you have 4 more weeks of reading to do here! LOL! Thanks for writing -- and for your graceful response to my post which was written in haste and maybe not as "politely" as it could've been - but then again, at my age, I tend to just say what's on my mind and move on. . . ;->
Abraxan
Abraxan posted a comment on Thursday 9th February 2006 9:19am
BTW, Quizzer - I couldn't figure out how to add to my comments without erasing them and starting over (which is what happens if I hit "reply" to the same review more than once, argh), but I wanted to add -- now that people have seen what Harry can do even when he's seriously injured, he's much SAFER than he was before. And that was part of my plan in doing this scene.
Hope I did this right so you guys can see it! argh. . .
Abraxan, the totally non-techie!
Leticia posted a comment on Thursday 9th February 2006 3:23am
Excellent chapter! I'm just sorry that the story is coming to an end (or so I assume, you really got me with unexpected cursing in the Great Hall!). I hope that you plan to write more!
The only thing that I wondered about is Peter's presence in Snape's memory. I realise that this is adapted from canon information, but if Snape knew Pettigrew was a Death Eater, surely he would have told Dumbledore? Even if that was the first time that he saw him, it still would have been something to inform Dumbledore about. If he knew that there was more to the story of the Potter's deaths, and didn't tell anyone, allowing Sirius to go to Azkaban, then that is rather less forgivable (from Harry's POV especially) that revealing the prophecy. If he allowed schoolboy grudges to stop himself from seeing that Sirius might be innocent, then I am rather dissatisfied with his ending in this story. But then I've always had a strong personal dislike for the man!
Abraxan replied:
I currently have my new kitten, Jake, trying to help me tyupe, so forgive me2 if my answert is brief.. (Darnekd kitten doewsn't type very well, does he? LOLP!) I'm also short on time (have to leave for an appt. in a few min.), so please look at the other reviews for my views on Snape and what he should have told Dumbledore. Glad you liked the chapter! Yes, the story wki,. (kitten again) will be ending in 4 weeks -- two more chapters of story, two-part epilogue. I hope you enjoy it! I do plan to write more, but I'm currently working on an original novel aimed at "real" publication. WHen a plot bunny strikes, I'll do a Harry short-story, but no more novels that aren't for paid publication -- they simply take up too much time to do them for free (although it's been fun!)
Abraxan
Quizer posted a comment on Thursday 9th February 2006 3:04am
Did Zabini and Harry ever clash before this chapter happened? I really can't remember, it's been too long ago I read "Refiner's Fire". If not, this confrontation could have been avoided neatly, but chances are they did clash before. Since you did plan this scene since the beginning, it probably wouldn't have mattered anyway. I still don't like the results of that scene, but then again, I don't have to.
> There's no pleasing everyone, and the only one I can please here is me.
> I like it, so it stays.
I agree with you here. I write fanfiction myself, and I primarily do it for my own enjoyment. That my readers like it as well is only an added bonus, for me and for them. ;)
> Not one of my betas said, 'Oooo, that's one time too many!" Not one.
> Even if they had, I probably would have used the scene anyway, because I
> like it. And it serves a purpose. Some of the readers get it (look on
> Fanfiction.net and read Old Fart's review to see what I mean -- HE "got"
> what I was doing with this chapter).
Maybe the betas didn't think it was their job to question your story-related decisions. I certainly wouldn't presume it, although as an author, I would probably appreciate the extra input. You could try asking for their opinions, but only if you really want to - I'm not trying to prove a point here.
Unfortunately, I wasn't able to find Old Fart's review in the last two chapters of Destiny on FF.net and I don't feel like combing through all the reviews you've ever gotten. Could you tell me where it is located?
> Most adults over the age of 40 (ballpark, anyway) will probably
> recognize these rhythms for what they are - reality hitting you in the
> face.
Since I'm only twenty, I don't really know what you're talking about here. I've lead a pretty sheltered life so far, and I find it hard to believe that Harry's hardships equal or correlate in some way to what the average real-life adult goes through. Did life treat you this harshly?
I still think that Harry could have gone through some of these encounters without being crippled by them for some time. Yes, life includes hardships, and many of them hit you in the face at the most inconvenient of times and when you least expect it, but some of these can be dealt with without being knocked to rock-bottom, especially by someone strong, like Harry. The way you portray his life, he's little more than a macabre version of a certain toy, which after getting knocked over slowly rights itself, only to be knocked over again. I don't know the english name of that toy, but you know what I mean. Believe me, it is that bad.
I never had a problem with Casey dying. It was the only plausible way to get her out of the way and Ginny into the picture. Since the story was labeled as Harry/Ginny, I knew what to expect. By the same token, her parent's couldn't stay around, because that meant more loose ends. They would have kept Harry from moving on. It was still a pretty sad thing, but I understood perfectly why it had to happen from a story-architectonic point of view.
> For instance, in Chapter 17 of Destiny, where Molly blew up and tried to > break up Harry and Ginny -- the readers who are old enough to have
> nearly grown kids of their own knew exactly what was going on.
> The young readers (or those who have never had children of their own)
> were screaming at me that Molly would never do that! But those of us
> who have raised our families know she WOULD most likely feel that way at
> some point real life (because we have, or our parents did) -- and many
> younger readers just didn't understand that.
Again, I'm not nearly grown-up enough to have been in that position myself, but because it's Molly, I'm buying it. She's impulsive to a fault and doesn't always think clearly where her family, especially her kids are concerned. It doesn't mean that I like it being in the story, though, and I can't ever see myself reacting like that, because it clashes with one of my fundamental beliefs, that you should never stand in the way of love. I also like to believe that I'm more level-headed than Molly, even when it concerns my own kids that I hope I will have someday.
A story doesn't need action to survive. Action, if well-written, can be used to put sunspense into the story so the author doesn't have to overuse other kinds of dramatic implement. I think you do well enough to achieve this effect and you could use it more. I liked how Harry fried Zabini, very much so, but the fact that Harry nearly got killed (yet again) totally ruined the effect.
I'm out of stuff to write for now, so I'll just end this now. Tell me if you grow tired of this conversation - I for one am enjoying it.
Quizer
Abraxan replied:
Zabini has attacked Harry several times (most notably in front of the whole school when Harry and Ron did the Animagus assembly).
My betas DO give me their opinions, some of them quite loudly! And I may argue with them from time to time about what they suggest, but I do LISTEN - and I often change things as a result.
Old Fart's review is in the reviews for chapter 32 - it was posted yesterday, so it should be easy enough to find. Sorry I don't have a clue how to give you a message number for it, nor do I have time to look for it right now (have to leave for an appt. in a VERY few min. now!)
You're talking about a Sock-'Em Clown (that's one name for them) which you hit and it stands right back up again. Nope, I'm NOT portraying him that way, quite honestly. There are subtleties going on here (dang spelling and kitten!! Sil;yu Jake!) that take a bit of life experience to understand. I don't have time to explain them here, sorry. But those of us who are old enough have either had such experiences or witnessed them. Trust me on this. They don't have to physically cripple you - usually they cripple you emotionally. But Harry's a very PHYSICAL being, and he's the lead warrior in a war to end all wars, so it's natural that he'd be physically hurt a lot.
Glad you understand about Casey. Many people did NOT and took me to task for it quite severely!
Again, you're very YOUNG! Not that there's anything wrong with that, and your parents may not have had a "mid-life crisis" yet - but Molly's reaction is based on things that could REALLY happen! The old farts among us recognize that. Sometimes your tongue just takes off on its own without any reference to the brain or your normal attitude toward things, adn gets you in hot water. THat's what happened her. Her deeply submerged feelings just exploded to the surface and she lost control completely. It happens, and when people are under the kind of stress she is, it can happen just as messily and illogically as it did here. Life IS messy and illogical a lot of the time, and that's what I was writing.
I'm glad you're enjoying the conversation, but I don't honestly know what else I can say to explain to you taht what happened in the scene was totally logical TO ME -- and to my older readers. You have a good head on your shoulders. You will be totally shocked by how your attitude about things will change as you age and go through life-changing experiences. Trust me on this. I was all sweetness and light, totally naive about many things, non-confrontational little Goody Two-Shoes (that's an old nursery rhyme, in case you don't recognize it), and yet life experience has changed me into an often hard-nosed, aggressive-at-times person I barely recognize -- all because of some horrific things I've been through in my life, which I don't care to elaborate on here. What I've written reflects life as I've known it and observed it. I've lived through several wars -- I'm illustrating war in many ways throughout these fics. I'm not ANTI-war -- I'm against people not supporting the troops, and against people not understanding that the troops have been through hell while they've been sitting at home reading fanfics and eating donuts. And that attitude colors a lot of what I've written. I wrote to someone that Zabini was, to me, like a suicide bomber, attacking in full view of lots of witnesses, not caring about the consequences, and what I had Harry do to him is not even the flicker of a candle compared to what I would like to do to those who think that way (And no, I won't get into political discussions here -- I'm not interested.) Anyway -- I'm running late now, so I have to go. I hope I've satisfied your curiosity about the reasons behind what I wrote. Whether you like how it turned out or not, *I* like it, and in my book (and this is MY book, after all! LOL!) that's what matters!
Abraxan
light fan posted a comment on Thursday 9th February 2006 1:45am
32 is the most amazing chapter! I've been disappointed that it seemed to take longer than usual for you to update this time, but it was well worth the wait. I'm glad you didn't just finish the story after Voldemort's demise, as I expected you to do. Thanks so much for one of the best-written HP fictions I've ever read. I'd love to see you continue this story forever, but I'm sure that's not possible. I hope when you're finished, you'll consider posting another one. Thanks again for sharing!
Abraxan replied:
No, it didn't take longer -- it was a week to the day, as usual (updates are on this site every Wednesday like clockwork, unless I'm out of town without internet access long enough to not be able to get the chapter to Asad, who uploads them here). I'm glad you're happy the story is going on -- I don't know why so many people thought the story would just STOP when Voldemort died! There are TONS of loose ends to tie up, and the kids need to finish the school year! :-D
I'm so glad you're enjoying the story, but nope, it won't go on forever. There are two more chapters in Destiny, then a two-part epilogue that takes the characters about 15 years into the future. The epilogue is a seedbed of story ideas for me to use to craft short stories when I feel the need to visit Harry and his friends again. I've already started an original novel aimed at "real" publication, and that's what I'll be concentrating on for a while, but you never know -- sometimes plot bunny will bite me on the nose and I'll whip out a Harry story in a very short time, as happened with the Christmas story. Thanks for writing!
Abraxan
Patches posted a comment on Wednesday 8th February 2006 8:25pm
Excellent chapter but when does the heartache end? Of course there are idiots that still are against Harry and company. Hopefully it will slow down after the demonstration of Harry's power. Thank you for updating so regularly. I really appreciate it. I have a lot of stories I am folloing that have been on hold for a while. It is frustrating to have to wait but I wait because the stories are so good. I really appreciate all the authors efforts and I want them all to know how grateful I am for their efforts. I look forward to your next update. Thank you again! pms
Abraxan replied:
It ends soon, never fear -- I only have two more chapters in which to wreak havoc in Harry's life, after all!! :-D Seriously, you're right -- there ARE still idiots who are against Harry. But after what he did to Zabini when he was seriously injured himself, I don't think many of them will act on those feelings! I'm glad you're enjoying my stories!
There are two more chapters of Destiny, then a two-part epilogue and then Destiny's done! Thanks for reviewing so regularly! I appreciate it a lot!!
Abraxan
Chthonius posted a comment on Wednesday 8th February 2006 7:51pm
Good chapter. Brilliant idea to have the lung injury requiring the gills transformation... a very original idea and plot-point.
I was wondering how Harry would help Snape, so it's good to see that resolved.
I look forward to the next chapter.
Abraxan replied:
THANKS! I'm so glad you liked that!! I've always been fascinated by the idea that a person could breathe underwater like a fish. When I was a kid, there was a TV series on called "Man from Atlantis" starring Patrick Duffy (who went on to star in "Dallas"). He swam as Harry did in the Second Task, with gills and fishlike movement. I was a seriously asthmatic child (still have it, but it's under control now, praise the Lord and good medicine!!), but the idea of not needing lungs, of having that kind of freedom in the water, always intrigued me. It was fun for me to write this chapter as a result of all that. Glad you liked it! And glad you liked the Snape bit too. Thanks for writing!
Abraxan
ridmania posted a comment on Wednesday 8th February 2006 5:00pm
awesome stuff!!! keep up the great work!!! hope all goes good now? lol! thats a lot of action. glad zabini died but would have een better if they coud have tortured him a bit or something. keep up the great work you bloody legend!!!!
Abraxan replied:
You don't think Zabini was tortured at least a LITTLE bit while being stuck to the wall with electric bolts shooting out of his limbs and head???? YIKES! I would think that was pretty darned uncomfortable! LOL! But that's just me. . .heehee. Glad you liked it! Thanks a lot! All's PRETTY good now, but there may still be a bump or two left in the road. . .
Thanks for the nice review!
Abraxan
Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Wednesday 8th February 2006 2:09pm
Heh, "It ain't over 'til it's over". I guess that identifies and deals with at least one DE wannabe (or apprentice) at Hogwarts. I'm certain there will still be more challenges for Harry, still, before he graduates - reamining enemies surfacing and such. In any case, you're doing a nice job tying up the threads of the story.
Still, the damage done by the uneven loosening can be dealt with and he won't, after recovery, loose flexibility or endurance but I wonder if any of that cure could be applied to emphysema? I wonder how many muggle deseases wizards and witches get? Esp. ones with a genetic component like cancer.
Abraxan replied:
Thanks for saying I'm doing a nice job tying up the threads of the story!! I really appreciate that!
I don't know if that cure could be applied to anything in reality -- I made it up, after all! ;-) But it would be nice if it could help. I don't know how many Muggle diseases magical people get -- that's a question for JKR, I suspect. I'm amazed at how my "cure" has made some people think seriously about it being used in real life! Another reviewer said he thought it might be a good way to treat serious burn victims! I don't know anything about medicine, but if my fictional cure causes some medical person to ease someone's suffering, that would be so amazing! (Science fiction often does lead to science fact - so why not do the same with fantasy?? :->)
Thanks for writing! I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter!
Abraxan
dogfoot75 posted a comment on Wednesday 8th February 2006 2:03pm
Man, I hate your Ginny. She's so weak and has such a quick temper - and no one cares that she does. It's all, oh, she's just a Weasley, blah, blah, blah. Then she thinks that she can run everyone's life and get mad if they don't have the same goals in life, like Hermione. She's a bigot because even though she has a Muggleborn as a best friend, she thinks that Muggles don't love their babies.
Someone needs to slap her upside the head.
Abraxan replied:
Where in the world did you get such an idea????? Certainly not from my story! Yes, Ginny has a temper, but she isn't bigoted toward Muggle-borns! If you don't like my Ginny, go read someone else's!
Yikes, I would never write a Muggle-born hating Ginny. You need to read the chapter again -- that just is NOT there!
Abraxan
Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Wednesday 8th February 2006 1:53pm
Ch.32 - - Can't Harry ever catch a break? You'd think it would finally be clear that he is NOT someone to mess with.
This is an excellent chapter. Fully within canon as you've extended it, and a more than clever plot. Fine dialogue. Ginny's bravery through this entire tale has been amazingly well written.
Pretty work!
Abraxan replied:
Yeah, poor Harry! I think it finally IS clear that he is not someone to mess with! After what happened to Zabini, why would anyone even try???? And maybe that's the point of the whole thing. . . .
Glad you enjoyed the chapter! "Fully within canon" and "more than clever plot" -- wow! Thanks so much!! What a lovely review! I really appreciate it!
Abraxan, smiling all over her face!
Trey1 posted a comment on Wednesday 15th February 2006 6:27am
Abraxan replied: